Today, I am participating in the Writing Contest: You Deserve to be Inspired. Hosted by Positive Writer. You can find the direct link to their page here.
The entry for this contest?
A story that is supposed to inspire someone. A story that is supposed to inspire you.
Today, I am gonna do something different. Instead of trying to inspire you directly, I will start by trying to inspire myself, but I will need your help with that.
Hi, I am Arizona. I am an insecure person, regardless of what people may think or how you see me.
Today, like all the others days, I looked in the mirror and saw the same thing I always see. I heard the same things I always hear.
There is a little voice in the back of my head and if you are anything like me, you will know exactly which voice I mean.
This is the voice that tells me I am not good enough, that points out all my flaws and wants to change everything about myself.
The nasty voice that laughs when I fail, that says: I told you so.
The little voice that sneers whenever I try, whenever I dream, whenever I wish.
It is the voice that whispers that I can’t. That I shouldn’t. That I won’t.
I haven’t found the courage to stand up to that voice yet. It scares me.
Does your little voice scare you too?
So today, instead of trying to shut up my own voice, I will ask a favour of you.
Instead of talking to myself, can I practice my speech on you? Can I pretend for a moment that we are the same person and tell you everything I can’t tell myself?
I knew I could. You are such a kind person after all. I could tell.
Okay, here goes. Here are my insecurities…
You have nothing to be insecure about.
What do you mean your eyes are wonky? I hadn’t even noticed! I think they are beautiful and they reflect your pure soul. I can see your kindness and your warmth when I look into your eyes.
You think that your lips are weird looking? Why? I was just thinking they had a nice colour and shape and apart from that, how could I not love the mouth that says such beautiful and encouraging things to me?
What is wrong with your hands? I love your hands. They held me when I was sad, they helped me up when I fell, they caressed me when I felt unloved.
Why are you not happy with your legs? They have carried you all this time. They have carried you all the way until you met me and ever since then, they have walked besides my legs the whole time. Those legs have carried you throughout all our adventures.
Why are you complaining about your shoulders? They are strong and enduring. They didn’t just carry around your worries and problems, when I was having a hard time with mine, those shoulders carried my burdens and pains too.
Why are you unhappy with yourself? I am so glad with who you are and what you are to me. I can’t imagine my life without you in it and you are perfect the way you are. Please never change anything.
( Very, very big sigh) Wow… That was heavy, wasn’t it? It definitely was for me. I cried a little bit, to be honest.
Thank you for letting me say all those wonderful things to you.
By saying them to you, I couldn’t use the harsh and mean words that I usually reserve for myself and this might have been the kindest thing I have ever told myself.
Actually, I am sure this is the kindest thing I have ever said to myself.
I never knew how to be gentle with myself. I have never been kind to myself. But today, right now actually, while I was writing this story, I learned a little bit more about how to be kind to myself.
By distancing myself from me, I finally managed to talk to me the way I talk to my friends and family. I could finally console myself with the same gentleness and kindness I have reserved for the people I care about.
By pretending this wasn’t me, I finally said all the things I should have been saying to myself instead of all that other crap.
By writing this, I just figured out how to love myself a little bit more.
But I didn’t just write this for me. I wrote this for you.
Whenever you look in the mirror, you might be beating yourself up as well and you might not have found the strength to silence your insecurities.
So please allow me to show you my thanks and return the favour.
Next time you look in the mirror, use my eyes. The eyes of a stranger, that isn’t really a stranger anymore.
When you are having a hard time with being happy with yourself, come back here. This time you don’t have to pretend you are me anymore. This time, when you read my speech, pretend you are saying this to yourself.
Please, read it again and say those things to yourself.
Maybe next time, you can make your own speech and practice it on me. Pretend I have all the same insecurities that you have and write down how you would silence my doubts, how you would console me if I were your friend, how you would cheer me up if I were a loved one.
If I can inspire myself, you can inspire yourself. I know you can.
And when you are done writing, read it to yourself. Out loud. I know this all sounds a bit silly, but it works. Trust me.
Say all those kind things to yourself, read them with the same voice that usually puts you down. After all, hearing good things from others is great, but ultimately, your own voice is the only voice that truly counts.
And that is another thing I learned. While I wrote this letter to you and to me, actually.
Make your kind words stronger than all your nasty whispers.
I hope that after reading this, you also learned how to love yourself a little bit more. I sincerely hope you do.
My friend. Thank you.
Practice on me. You can say all the things you can’t yet say to yourself here. I will be your new friend.
Enter the contest yourself and maybe you will win one of their fabulous prizes! Entry is free, so why not give it a shot?
If you do enter, link back to ArizonaType so that I can read your story as well!
( Contest ends 1 May 2017)